A little more than a year ago, Rob, Jordan, Bennett and I got a call to audition for a LIFE cereal commercial – as a family. We were only one of a handful of families called to audition so I figured our chances were pretty good – better than winning the lottery, at least!
Anyway, logistics-wise, it wasn’t easy to get us there. Jordan and Bennett had school, Rob was conducting interviews at work, etc. They gave us the latest audition time at 5:15 on Wednesday and told me that if Rob still couldn’t make it, to just bring photos of him. (After much cajoling and a few teensy-weensy threats – this really isn’t Rob’s “thing” – he agreed to show up.)
They told me not to “prep” my kids. No problem with Bennett. How would you even begin to prep a 14 month old? But, Jordan . . . I told her nothing about any of this until I picked her up from school that day and even then, all I said was that we were going to meet the people who make LIFE cereal. I told her that when they asked her questions, she needed to speak loudly and clearly and behave herself. She was very excited about all of this and told me that she was going to ask them for the recipe.
So . . . we all got there by 5:15 and were directed into a small room with a couch for us all to sit on. There were three people in the room with us and they were videotaping us as they asked us questions. They told me that when they asked Jordan questions, I could rephrase them to help her answer them. For example, if they said, “What do you like to do for fun?” I could say, “Remember what we did at the beach last summer . . .”
Fine. So far, so good. Then, they began asking us questions . . .
Let’s just say, Rob, Bennett and I did just fine . . .
And then there was Jordan . . .
First of all, she kept slouching on the couch with her feet up, showing her underwear. I had to keep repositioning her. Then, she seemed to find a true fascination with the taste of her fingers – which I had to keep pulling out of her mouth.
When they asked her questions . . . honestly, my non-stop, mile-a-minute, yap, yap, yap child became a mute.
She claimed she didn’t know the answers (how old she was became a tough question.) She whispered and mumbled her responses. No prompting from me was about to help.
They asked us why we liked LIFE cereal and choose to eat it in the morning. I was in the middle of explaining how busy our mornings are and how much easier it is to pour a bowl of cereal than make a big meal when my daughter decides that now would be the perfect time to find her voice and speak loudly and clearly so that all could hear.
She said, “Actually, we like to eat waffles.”
Yep. That really sealed the deal for us.
As I was getting the kids into their carseats when it was all over, Rob said, with a smile, “I think we nailed it!” I looked at him, hopeful that he had seen something in the whole experience that I had missed. I said, “Really?” He laughed and said, “NO! It was awful!” UGH!! He was right. It WAS awful!
The next morning, as we were getting ready for school, I yelled to Jordan, asking what she wanted for breakfast. Clear as a bell, she called back, “LIFE cereal!” Rob started to laugh again and said, “Did you hear that, Mommy? She wants LIFE cereal for breakfast.”
Needless to say, we haven’t heard about a call back. Oh, well . . . guess it just wasn’t meant to be. At least I’ll never be one of those stage moms on Dr. Phil who believes their child is destined to be a star! As Jordan told my mom, with a roll of her eyes, when asked about the audition, “It was so boring!”
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